What are personal boundaries?
Like in any sports you see, be it football, cricket, tennis, badminton etc, boundaries plays decisive role in shaping up the game.
They are the optimum limits up to which the moment of the game can be allowed.
Similarly in life too, there are boundaries, the personal invisible boundaries that we create for ourselves. They are the one which influence the behavior of others towards us in various situations.
These are the limits which stop people from creating that pressure to make us do the things that we do not want to.
More often than not we encounter such people in our life who tend to make our life uncomfortable.
They create an atmosphere of pressure for us to succumb. It becomes very difficult to handle such situation even for rational persons.
The fear of relationship breaks, and making others angry prevents us from opposing such acts of the people.
To have a personal boundary with politeness and persuasiveness is a challenging task.
But with few adjustments and efforts we can have great results.
I have mentioned few personal practices here which have helped me a lot to deal with such situations.
- Learn to say NO.
Saying No is important. You are willing to say No but not saying it, is faking yourself. You are being dishonest to yourself.
It means you have no respect for your feelings and emotions.
And if you do not respect yourself nobody else will.
You are not being rude or selfish by saying NO. If you feel you cannot do it, please go ahead and express yourself.
- You are Human,not a Machine.
A machine takes numerous commands and executes all of them.
You are not a machine. You have your limitations. You cannot accomplish each and everything. That’s a reality. Accept it.
Know yourself and have that boundaries beyond which people cannot force you.
- Chose to Love Instead of Fear.
On every single day make a deliberate attempt to do the things you love.
By doing this you will accept the things that you really like to do and politely say NO to all other things which make your life miserable.
You have a choice here. Select the one which uplifts you, pumps you.
You will start to have a splendid life.
- Adhering to principles of Good Manners.
While saying NO, use these words in your conversation:
»Thank you for your confidence in me, however…..
»Hope you can understand.
»Non-verbal expressions such as Nodding.
»A polite text message.
- Upgrade Yourself.
When you are armed with information, people will hesitate to try to influence you.
Because they know you have that extra edge over others and it will be really difficult to convince you.
Instead they will prefer to approach someone they see vulnerable and less knowledgeable.
To have a strong personal boundary you need to upgrade yourself.
Isn’t it interesting?
- Analyze the Importance.
You should learn to know the importance of such situations and its impact on you.
It’s called the critical thinking.
You should be able to identify a very genuine request versus a fake one.
There may be situations when you have a genuine case and a little contribution from you can make huge difference.
You should analyze such circumstances and then make a decision.